and there is that pounding again. really hard in my chest and making my lips hot. almost making me dizzy.

i thought it had gone away. again. but it came back. again. i suppose maybe it was the thinking. and the advice.

i think there might be more than one person that is right for us in this world. but also maybe only one that will fill "the gap". someone else could be fine, even fantastic, for the rest of your life, but something will be missing.

i am not unhappy. but i am. so much.
and i cannot sit around and wait for the universe to deliver. right? right.